I freaking LOVE college life!!!!!

Ok, oh my gosh is college fun or what!? I LOVE my classes, I love my friends (I occasionally love my homework! hahahaha) I love music and singing and everything! (I even love my job, regardless of how incredibly frustrating it is!!!) But lately I've really just been loving my friends! Now granted, I don't have a BUNCH of friends, but I do have two absolutely amazingly awesome friends! Last night Kimberlie and I really wanted to get out of the apartment and Shuey really wanted to get out of his house, so we started on our adventures! (hahahaha)

We decided to go to Target! So fun..I bought paper and Kimberlie bought school supplies...I know, exciting, huh?!

Well, then we went to Best Buy to check out DJ hero (weird game!!!). We saw the coolest kid (probably like 5 or something) with his brothers playing the Beatles Guitar hero...his two older brothers were playing it too, but the littlest one was doing the singing and although it embarrassed his brothers, he rocked...you could hear him throughout the whole store!!! Well, we got bored with DJ hero pretty fast...then we looked at washers, dryers, fridges, microwaves, stoves/ovens, and lots of other appliances that we couldn't wait to buy when we're rich. And then as we were about to leave we heard some awesome sound coming from somewhere, so we went to find it! The sound was coming from this little cubical with couches and two (awesome) TVs that were playing Transformers on a blu-ray player. The combination of the sound system and the picture was one of the most incredible things I've ever experienced in my many hours of media viewing! The picture was so clear and perfect and real it almost hurt to watch! It was AMAZING! I'd never really understood why people like blu-ray so much, but oh my GOSH!!!!!! It seriously felt like the characters could literally come out of the screen; like if I just reached through I could become part of the movie. I will NEVER wonder about people's obsession with blu-ray ever again...that was something to behold! WOW!!

So, after that we left Best Buy and didn't know where to go, but Kimberlie saw Jo-Ann's and she needed to buy some fabric for a shirt for her sewing class, so we went there. We found the COOLEST dragon fabric...their flames were sparkly!!! We found buttons and thread to match...and then we saw the line. We got a ticket and we got 00...they were on 63. We weren't too stoked about waiting.

And then I came up with the GENIUS idea of going to Coneys to get some custard while we waited (it was pretty much next door, and although it was freeeezing outside they liked the idea too!!!) So we went and got some custard (and my friend, Emily, was working and was the supervisor, so she told Spencer that it was ok to give me the discount even though I wasn't working...sweet! 50% off custard! Pays to be nice!!! hahaha) Then we went back to Jo-Ann's and they were only on 78/79...crazy! So we decided to look at pattern books, specifically costumes...it was fun! Then Kimberlie got her fabric all cut and bought and we were on our way, not sure of what to do again.

Shuey has been wanting to go bowling a lot lately, and I like bowling, but Kimberlie adamantly refused. But we ended up at Fat Cats anyway. Well, Kimerlie's childhood friend is coming up and needed a place to stay, so Kimberlie had been asking all her guy friends if he could stay with them, and Luke said yes. Well, he's been trying to hang out with her for a while, so she invited him to come bowling with us. It was so much fun, and after almost two whole games Kimberlie also invited Cody. (he is soooo tall and sooo big...but I'm a better bowler! YES!!!) So we ended up playing 4 1/2 games (we payed for unlimited bowling for the night, so we stayed till they closed) Oh my goodness....last night was so much fun!!!!

I totally freaking LOVE college life!!!! Staying up all night having fun, and then staying up all night studying, eating cheap food, never sleeping, loving school, getting so sick and tired of school... I love it all! It's the best, but right now my favorite part is my friend!!!!! They are so awesome!

(oh, side note: The three of us, after a 7-eleven hot chocolate run, decided to see if we could drive all the way around Utah Lake...that was quite an adventure, let me tell you!) So yeah, I totally adore my friends, and I hope everyone else does too, cuz they rock!!!

~Manda

Oh, P.S. I love pics on my blog, but I didn't have my camera last night (plus Kimberlie and Shuey don't like getting their pictures taken--lame) But hopefully in the future I'll have legit pics...cuz you know what they say: "pics, or it didn't happen!" hahahahahaha

Brief overview of the fun I'm having! yay!

Ok, so last night was pretty much a blast!!! Just thought I'd let everyone know!

So Chamber Choir had a concert last night where we premiered one of Kurt Bestor's new pieces and got to have him conduct us. He is a freaking AMAZING conductor! It was way fun to follow him and learn a little more about what he wanted in the piece that he wrote! Yeah, that was fun!

After the concert Kimberlie and I made a plan to go get some hot chocolate from 7-eleven, but it was postponed by an invite from John and Nolan to hang out at the hot tub. I don't know how long we were hanging out with them (it was until we couldn't even tell it was cold outside...the hot tub got SO hot!!! hahaha) It was so much fun! I got to learn a phrase in Norwegian (where John served his mission.) It was kinda weird, for a while there were about 4 languages being spoken at the same time in the hot tub (one of which was Norwegian, John went on his mission to Norway, he was companions with Anders who had joined us a little later, and Nolan knew Norwegian, but I can't remember how). There were also two guys speaking Russian and then this group of kids saying phrases from a bunch of different places. Kimberlie and I were so lost, not being able to understand Norwegian (which, for some reason I think was possibly intentional)...but yeah, it was so much fun!!!

Well, after they left Kimberlie remembered that she needed to pick up her medication from the pharmacy. She was going to call someone (I can't remember if it was "freakin Luke" or Nolan) but she couldn't get a hold of him at any rate, so she called Shuey. He came and I was finally able to give him his motorcycle (I promised him one...it was a toy) and he took us to Walgreen's and we were finally able to make our 7-eleven hot chocolate run! yum yum yum!!! Then, cuz he didn't want to go home he just hung out at our apartment till they started booting/ticketing cars.

Then Luke came over...I don't know how long he and Kimberlie were hanging out cuz I went to bed...but yeah, in a nutshell, last night was a BLAST!!!

MONTEVERDI

So, a few years ago I did a project on the similarities between opera and the Beatles. It was fun. Well, I did a lot of research on the origins of opera and I learned that the father or Opera was Claudio Monteverdi! We just got to him in my Music History and Lit class and I got soooo excited. Well, in the Renaissance the greatest composer was Josquin des Prez, a Franco Flemish composer. After (chronologically) Josquin, Monteverdi is the greatest composer! He was a great example of a transition composer (yes, like Beethoven) because he has a lot of Renaissance, he fathered the opera and opened the doors in the Baroque period, he also proved points of how good composers have different styles for different occasions (he started that idea pretty much!) Oh my goodness! I just LOVE Monteverdi!!! He freaking ROCKS!!! And we get to study him now!!!! YAY!!!!! Just thought I'd let y'all know! :)

~Manda

Great week...Great girls night!!!

WooHoo!!! This week has been absolutely INCREDIBLE!!!! I had Fall Break! It was awesome! I worked everyday (which was long, but good for the income-ness it brings) and I slept in everyday (which was good for the lack of sleep-ness that comes with the college territory). My roommates and I had an awesome girls night last night. We watched Pretty in Pink and Clueless and got crashed by groups of guys twice.

Ok, so work stories: I've come to the conclusion that I need to put when I work as my facebook status or something bad might happen. This isn't because anything bad has happened from not putting it on, but because many great things have happened because I do. So...on Tuesday this really really cute guy I met at the grocery store (he was the cashier) came in and totally knew who I was...Alex (a kid I work with) tried to help me ask him out, I didn't, but it was still fun! The next time I worked, Thursday, my friend Hailey came in to say hi and to pick up a pint she was promised from giving blood, and then my favorite favorite teacher came in with his family. Then on Friday I decided to say that I MIGHT give the friends who came into Coneys to see me a prize. So low and behold Kimberlie (my roommie) and Shuey came in for their prizes! I didn't have any, but I went to the dollar store and got her an Ariel Disney Princess figurine and him a toy motorcycle. Allison also brought her date in, and although she didn't know about the prize thing I got her a vanilla candle...it's pretty and smells good...seemed like the perfect thing for Allison! And then on Saturday the cutest little family came in! The daughter already had her Halloween costume..she was Belle and had the dress, beads, tiara...she was so so so cute! But that's not all...when I was going home (for the girls night) I got to ride on the same bus as them!!! It was awesome being able to ride the bus with royalty! But I don't think I can stop putting my work schedule up on facebook...even though only two of the people coming in (Kimberlie and Shuey) had anything to do with the fact that I write that, I don't think I should stop. Not only is it good luck, but I get more excited to work. (This is mostly because I wonder what awesome magical thing will happen when I do! hahahahahaha).

And then the girls night! Wow that was fun! We had Razzleberry Pie, Rocky Road custard, Pumpkin ice cream and Double Vanilla ice cream. I finished my Halloween Costume (spaceship mechanic...Kaylee from Firefly)...I decided that I'll probably be working and we're allowed to wear costumes...and if I don't get to wear it to work then I have the perfect cosplay for when I finally go to Comic Con! But yeah...it got crashed twice. First was by these guys we met at the hot tub. John and Bobby (whose name is actually Nolan or something like that...he's an interesting person...he made me sing in the hot tub...THAT was quite an adventure) So yeah, they came and brought their Norwegian friend. Then John brought up the time when he took Kimberlie and I to 7-eleven to get slurpees...well, he said we were ungrateful (which is sooo untrue...we just wouldn't give him a massage!) So I asked him if a Heath bar would show gratitude...he said yes, so I gave him my Heath bar...(this part totally made my roommate, Loreto, crack up!!!) So when I handed him the candy bar he totally grabbed my hand...it was a little weird! (not gonna lie...hahahaha) but after that he said it was all fine! When they left, Carmen and Loreto were laughing so much...yeah, Bobby and John are kinda crazy...Bobby more than John, but still.

They left to go see Harry Potter at the dollar theater and then it was about 1 1/2 hours before Davis and his friend came. Davis is a kid from Kimberlie's Chemistry class...they study together a lot!!! He is sooooo funny and soooooo random!!! Yeah, he's crazy. So they stayed till 12, when they had to leave anyway.

Yeah, my week has been fun! I didn't watch too much TV (I hope) and I got a lot of stuff done...had an incredible voice lesson...wow! I freaking LOVE fall break!!!

So, that's everything (I think)...Life is wonderful!!! Talk to you all later!!!

~Manda

Must be Midterms

So...it must be midterms!!! Every semester a wave of complete and total dread washes over me...twice. Once at midterms and once right before finals. I just happened today! I was having a great day...then WOOSH!!! Dread. Now don't get me wrong, I'm still having a great day, the stress level just went up a notch that's all! My stomach hurts, I'm getting mega-headaches, and do I want to go to school? No, not really! Must be that time of the semester! I know I'll be fine once all of the big tests and performances are out of the way...well, I'll be fine till December. GAH! I really really dislike midterms! Well...back to the cleaning (for cleaning checks tomorrow) and the studying! YAY! (hehehe...that there was sarcasm)

~Manda

Der Erlkönig

So we analysed the scariest piece of music today! It is sooooo cool, but sooooo creepy!

It's Der Erlkönig. Poem by Gothe and music by Schubert. It's based on a German legend, and the poem is about a father and son going through the woods to go home to take care of the sick son and the son hears/sees the Erlking (elf-king) but the father doesn't and continues to reassure the boy while the Erlking continues to scare him. In the end the father rides off with the son as he realizes that the boy is in danger, but it is too late and the son dies! yeah...pretty creepy! But an absolutely AMAZING piece of (really scary) music!

So, here's the translation, but beware...it's scary!

(I'm putting in who talks when...it makes more sense that way!)

(Narrator)

Who rides, so late, through night and wind?

It is the father with his child.

He holds the boy in the crook of his arm

He holds him safe, he keeps him warm.

(Father)

"My son, why do you hide your face so anxiously?"

(Son)

"Father, do you not see the Erl king?

The Erl king with crown and tail?"

(Father)

"My son, it's a wisp of fog."

(Erlking)

"You lovely child, come, go with me!

Many a beautiful game I'll play with you;

Some colourful flowers are on the shore,

My mother has many golden robes."

(Son)

"My father, my father, can't you hear,

What the Erl king quietly promised me?"

(Father)

"Be calm, stay calm, my child;

The wind rustles through dry leaves."

(Erlking)

"Do you want to come with me, dear boy?

My daughters shall wait on you fine;

My daughters lead the nightly dances

And will rock and dance and sing you to sleep."

(Son)

"My father, my father, can't you see there,

The Erl king's daughters in the gloomy place?"

(Father)

"My son, my son, I see it well:

The old willows they shimmer so grey."

(Erlking)

"I love you, your beautiful form entices me;

And if you're not willing, I shall use force."

(Son)

"My father, my father, he's grabbing me now!

The Erl king has done me harm!"

(Narrator)

The father shudders; he rides swiftly,

He holds the moaning child in his arms.

He can hardly manage to reach his farm;

In his arms, the child was dead.

An Epiphany!

(yeah, this has nothing to do with the following post! hahaha)

Ok, so if you've had to be around me lately I'm pretty sorry! Life for miss Amanda has been rather frustrating! School has been difficult, work-difficult, friends-not that difficult, and boys-oh so difficult!!! But I decided to change that today. There are times in your life when things go badly. It is only after experiencing that craziness, wallowing in it a little, and finally admitting defeat that one is able to combat the misery in life. This admittance comes in moments of clarity and I believe I have experienced one of these moments tonight.

Now granted, in my life most frustration stems from guys and then leaks into other aspects of my life. In the current case I am interested in someone who I know will never be interested in me. It has been frustrating. But tonight, between practicing voice and finishing laundry I had a moment of clarity. My head was not clouded with emotion, academics, concern, it was clear and wandering (the best times for a mind are when it is clear and wandering, I believe that anyway) and I realized that everything is ok! So what if I haven't really, really, really liked someone in over a year (technically almost 2). So what if I haven't been on a date with a guy that I am really attracted to in FOREVER...and so what if it's driving me insane!!!!! I don't need to worry about it!

Now, a person that knows me knows that even with this grand epiphany I will still worry about it, I will still be going slowly insane, and I will be perpetually frustrated about it. But one thing that this great moment of clarity brings is relief! Nothing will be as hard as it's been (at least for a little while), life will be simple!

Now don't get me wrong, I love my life! I love my roommates, my friends, my classes, my job (most of the time...hahaha), my family, everything!!! I just LOVE life! (But there are those times when you want to go into an abandoned parking lot and scream and scream and scream till your throat and your lungs just can't take it anymore! It's fun!!!) So yeah, that's what happened after church today!

~Manda

LOOONG day

So, today has been a long, long, LONG day!!! We had the President Inauguration for President Holland (Elder Holland's son). The Inauguration went over (for about an hour) and the choir was the last thing (and in the middle)...so yeah, there were tests, busses, lessons, etc. all missed due to the length of the meeting. Then an hour after the inauguration was a sound check for Chamber choir for our performance at the president's ball (a hugely expensive banquet for the people who help with scholarships and stuff). And that lasted for about an hour. And let me tell you, we were AWFUL!!! At least the first few times through it. The way the stage was set up we couldn't hear the piano or each other...it was SO hard to sing the song! But then they got monitors and mics up and running...and that helped soooo much!!! I left that with a KILLER migraine and went back to my apartment to finish up some homework, watch the office, take something for the headache, and possibly get some sleep before our next performance. Well, I got really wound up due to some extenuating circumstances and the caffeine in the Excedrin migraine didn't help, so I wasn't exactly able to sleep. My roommate, Kimberlie, and I decided to go to Subway thinking that fresh air and lunch would be a good idea. It wasn't a bad idea, but I'm not completely sure it was a good idea. She and I got to talk, it's not like we don't do that all the time, but it was definitely good to talk to her...life has just been kind of hard lately...well, life and school...it was nice to commiserate. So, then after trying to go to sleep and so not being successful I got out of bed, fixed my hair and make up, put my dress back on, and ran to the bus (and yay, I caught it). I got to the school early, yay (I got to everything early today...woohoo), and voila, for some reason my headache was gone (and for some reason I was one of at least three people who left sound check with a migraine and got to the night performance and it was gone...must be something in the air). So we started warming up and going through our number...but you'll never guess where...a locker room shower! The acoustics were AMAZING!!! It was one of the coolest things I've ever heard! I wish we could always warm up in there..the sound we got really excited us and got rid of all the badness we had experienced at the sound check...we were gonna rock!

So the program got a little changed. We were supposed to sing in between Elder Holland and his son, but the Hollands had to leave to catch a flight, so we sang after he spoke and his son spoke. It was pretty awesome because we were allowed to hear the speeches from back stage. Back stage was also fun because I got to talk through a lot of the stuff that's been bothering me lately with the wonderful, darling, amazing Katie!!! (She's a girl from choir that does pageants and stuff. She's been Miss Davis County and in the top ten for Miss Utah) She was so sweet and really helped me out so much! And then we got to sing. It was kinda funny, because we are so not a show choir, yet today we sang two show tunes: Climb Every Mountain during the inauguration and For Good/Defying Gravity at the ball (the other piece we sang at the inauguration was Dona Nobis Pacem...it was fun) and during the Wicked medley we had to ham it up and look at each other and stuff...not stuff our choir is used to doing (at least not seriously). I dunno how many people actually did the looking at our neighbor thing, but we all would have rathered not to....just cuz it was funny and made us laugh most of the time. But according to Dyanne (our director) and how the performance felt...we did well! :)

And THEN after the performance, who do I see in the locker room but Marylin!!! It was awesome, she came back to say hi! I so most definitely did not expect that! It was pretty awesome!!!

So I got home after the performances just about exhausted, and there had been a party at our apt so there was all this leftover food. And low and behold my migraine is back and showing no mercy. I decided to take some more Excedrin (I know, I know...don't take it right before bed...but it hurt so much that I really couldn't sleep anyway) and after that had kicked in I went out to the living room and hung out with my roommates...well, all but Allison, she had a test she was getting ready to take and needed to sleep. But we all watched Enchanted and stayed up talking and laughing and singing till about 2:30. It was a blast (even though I was still nauseas from the headache...I wasn't all throbbing head pain, so all was good!) I broke my rule of no food after dark, but I think it's totally fine...I had a looooooong day!!!

K, so I was tired and all headache-y between concerts, right? but I couldn't sleep (partially in fear that my hair would go flat...hahahahaha) So I had some fun with my webcam and these are a couple of my favorite pics! hahaha

The whole "friend" thing

So, I just missed my bus...which isn't good, cuz the next one doesn't come for an hour...so I am now officially late to school. Like I said, not good.

I've been thinking a lot about what it means to "be a friend" or even more "be a good friend". On multiple occasions I have been told I am a good friend, on multiple occasions I have also been told I am not a good friend, or in fact, I've even been told I'm a bad friend.

My whole life (pretty much) I've found the whole "friend" thing a little difficult. I've always had a lot of friends, even at times a lot of close friends, but I guess that just must be the case for most people. Most of my life I have had a best friend, but that's where the whole idea and definition of "friend" kind of gets lost on me.

I decided to go to dictionary.com to see if it could help, here's what I got:

1. a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.

2. a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter.

3. a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile.

4. a member of the same nation, party, etc.

So, after reading those definitions I decided they really didn't clear anything up for me. according to the dictionary I was a friend, and if using the word "good" to mean I did it well, then yeah, I was a good friend. But it wasn't much help. I looked up friendly and ended up with the same conclusion. I'm a good friend and a friendly person. but I already knew that.

I then looked up "best friends" but all it had was "boon companion" and when I looked that up it gave me "best friends" again. I then looked it up on urbandictionary.com and here's what I got:

Many people, not all, go through different best friends throughout life. However, usually a person only has one real, true best friend in all that time. A best friend is not only someone you have a good time with, it is also someone you believe you can trust your life with. A best friend is the first person you call when the most amazing things happen in your life, and when the most horrific incidents happen. A best friend is the person you will always remember no matter what comes about. Some people lose the only true best friend they will ever have, and even when they get new "best friends" .. that old, real best friend is always on their mind. A best friend is almost like real family, a best friend gives the opinion you usually care most about. A best friend is the one who tells you the things you absolutely need to hear regardless of whether you want to hear it or not. A best friend is the person you usually can be around always and never get sick of. A best friend is someone you don't envy, and is the person you are grateful to have as a friend. A best friend is the one who will forgive you always, even when you've screwed up so bad. And a best friend is the one who even though you may have drifted apart from, when the time comes for them to hug you or congratulate you on an accomplishment or to console you on a loss.. they are the number one person you want to see, always because they are the person you've confided the most in and they are the person who knows you the best .. even when you both have changed.

So, after reading that, I guess I never really had a problem. The whole definition of "friend" and "best friend" are all fine and good, but in reality all they are is ambiguous. Nothing in this world can give you the exact guidelines to be able to be the perfect person in every situation with every friend you're ever gonna have. You will eventually mess up, accidentally burn bridges, hurt feelings, not "be there" in a way someone wants to, etc etc. People are never gonna be perfect. We're people, and therefore imperfect. And people working with people, if petty stuff and self interest are gonna get in the way, it's all going to be imperfect.

So, that was my latest adventure...the adventure of trying to find out the whole "friend" thing on a computer after missing the bus...yeah, I guess only life can tell you that one, a computer can't (too bad). So...I'm off to school. Bye!

~Manda

Quick Conference Overview

So I got to go to two sessions of conference today. And my good friend, David Shuey, came with me! I just wanted to share a few of the things that happened up at conference. They don't really have a lot to do with things I learned, but it's fun stuff anyway!

So first of all I went to high school with Shuey. We hung out at school a few times but we weren't really great friends or anything. Well, after graduation he and I talked to each other online a lot, and as of quite recently we've been hanging out a lot too. He's pretty much one of my best friends, so I asked him if he wanted to go to conference. He was a little reluctant at first (due to so much homework etc) but after telling him about going through the cool way and yummy lunch (and me getting as excited as I get as excited as I do about conference) he said yes! So yeah, he got to go to the conference center for the first time...and it was pretty fun.

K, so I LOVE my cousins. I was so excited when I got to my grandma's condo and saw my two BEAUTIFUL cousins, Camilla and Rachel. I just love them so so so sooooo much!!! I love it when I get to see family...I just feel so at home when I do! I also got to see my "cute aunt", Jean!!!!! I just love my family so so much!!!

So, cool little thing happened as we were going into the big, giant conference room, we passed David Archuleta!! I wouldn't have know it was him, but I saw a picture of him once almost a year ago. We asked if we could get a picture, but one of his people told us "he's not taking pictures today". So, no picture of us with David Archuleta. Sad day :( (hahahahaha)

Then, as we were leaving the afternoon session we ran into D. Todd Christopherson. We didn't ask for his picture, but I did get to shake his hand!!!! It was WAY awesome!

And THEN, during the afternoon session the choir sang MY song!!!!!!!!! YAY! They sang O Divine Redeemer!!!! That is my favorite solo of all time! It's pretty much my testimony in music form.....I was in AWE!!! It was just about the neatest thing ever!!! I LOVE conference!

So I love conference, and this one was TOTALLY awesome! It seemed like everything pointed to love and revelation....it was pretty freaking cool! So, that's all!

~Manda

The adventure of the twin purple toes

K, this is not meant to be a complain-fest or evoke multiple responses of sympathy. I just wanted to write about it. If you don't want to read about surgery or the fact that I have been in pain, please don't read this! And remember...I'm NOT looking for sympathy...I'm gonna be fine, and I know that. So only read this if you want to know what happened...but remember...I warned you (and I don't want any sympathy!!!) Thanks! :)

So, flattering picture, I know. I had surgery on two ingrown toenails yesterday. They were kind of extremely bad and kind of really painful. I went to the clinic at my school cuz it's cheap (and the hospitals don't take my out of state insurance). It had been raining and was super cold so I had tennis shoes on and my coat accompanied by all the warm accessories that you typically pull out for the winter (I get cold after anesthesia). So I went into the office and they said that I wasn't scheduled for the correct amount of time, so I probably wouldn't be able to get the surgery that day. I was devastated, but after the nurse practitioner saw my toes, there was no question...today was the day I was going to get the surgery. She took me into another room and had me put my feet up on the little paper covered bed. She called a girl in to hold my hand as she gave me the shots. The girl talked to me about school and my family, and just about everything to try to distract me. My toes were pretty beat up so a lot of the numb-er just kinda fell out and I got the needle stuck in my skin multiple times. The girl told me that not too long ago one girl held her hand so hard (from the shots for an ingrown toenail) that she left ring imprints in her hand. I didn't squeeze or anything, I just tried to focus on talking. It was weird, cuz my head would get all pressure-y, like it was filled with a HUGE, dense cloud that made my voice sound far away and my vision get all white, when it really hurt (which it did...she shot the stuff directly into the infection....just imagine someone injecting something into something that already causes you moderate discomfort...ouch!!!) Well, after I couldn't feel my toes she started cutting out the nail...but to my surprise my right toe was NOT numb. It hurt, so she shot up my toes again...this time they got totally and completely numb...to the point that I couldn't even feel the needle when it went in to give me the shot. So she went to work on cutting in and ripping out. I so didn't want to watch. Normally I get really curious with what they do to me, no matter how gross or disturbing, and since I can't feel it, I just pretend it's not happening to me...this is different tho. If I watch I get really nauseous and start imagining I'm in pain...so I made sure I was not watching AT ALL!!!! I still cringed cuz I could hear the cutting and feel the pulling...but I wasn't in pain...just kind of freaking out, that's all. She showed me the chunks of nail she was able to get out...they were huge and all spiky on the side that was growing into my toe. it was probably about 1/4 inch wide and totally jagged on one side...I just couldn't believe how BIG it was. I couldn't believe that THAT was what was causing me pain...no wonder!!! She asked me if I wanted her to kill the nail bed of the part she had just removed. There was no question in my mind: I had lived with this for a year...I NEVER wanted it back...even if my nail was thinner or whatever...NEVER ever did I want that giant piece of nail on my toe again...so she killed it. She warned me that because I'm young and my cells regenerate pretty quick there was a possibility that it would grow back, but she killed it the best she could. I was just fine with that. She then wrapped it up and taught me how to take care of it for the next few days. I got my shoes and socks back on, and made a follow up appointment for Monday.It was weird walking around with numb toes...yeah, my balance was pretty much totally off, but I made it to the bus.

The numbness started wearing off right around the time the bus came, and by the time I got to the stop near my apartment I could hardly walk. Someone saw me and offered to take my backpack. Even tho I refused she walked me to my door. It was way nice...she is in my ward and her name is Sandra...she was really nice. After she left I collapsed on the couch barely able to get my shoes off, my feet hurt so bad, but I got them off and it helped. I called home and let my family know of my adventure (so far). Through the conversation the pain got worse so I went on a mission to find some pain medicine...I ended up taking 4 ibuprofen, but it didn't kick in for a while.

So I got back to my apartment after the surgery at about 3:00 and sat on my couch with my feet up. I thought it was going to be a little annoying (the pain) boy was I wrong!!! Shots, sprains, fractures, broken teeth, spilling hot glue on my bare skin...I can handle it! But this was RIDICULOUS!!!! I was trying to do homework, but I just couldn't focus and my head kept feeling like there was a really dense cloud inside it. So I decided that I'd watch Battlestar Galactica till the pain subsided then I'd get back to my homework...yeah, that is SO not what happened. I started watching it and all of the sudden I was cringing and writhing in pain. It was like a really hot, little, focused ice-fire was finding its way up my legs. Also, when I have anything numbed I get REALLY cold, so I still had my socks on and I had a blanket...but they hurt me. My socks felt really really tight...I was too cold to take them off, so I just left them on and made sure they weren't stuck to the bandages (the purple bandage sticks to EVERYTHING!!!) So I tried focusing more on the show and tried texting a few of my friends to see if I could distract myself from the pain. Well, my friends were in class...so that backfired and I ended up feeling completely and totally alone, and the show started getting really emotional and even the tiniest thing would set me off crying...I turned the show off and realized that it was the pain that was making me cry (I've learned that constant intense pain, like this, or a migraine, is what gets me crying...spurt-y pain, not so much). I then decided I should try sleeping...maybe that would distract me...that one worked, but I was asleep till about 7:30 and when I got up I wasn't throbbing and crazy in pain, I just couldn't walk. I took some more ibuprofen and this pain reliever my roommate had from England (typically taken with ibuprofen) but I couldn't sleep...until 4 in the morning.

I woke up at bout 9 today (maybe 8:30...either way, it was REALLY sleeping in!) and I could walk a little better, but socks and shoes were out of the question and I couldn't stand for very long...so I emailed all my teachers and didn't go to school today, and because I can't get closed toed shoes on I can't go to work tonight...which is really annoying because I was looking forward to getting a lot of hours in this week.

So yeah, I'm not posting this to get sympathy, cuz I'm really fine, and I'm soooo grateful I was able to get the surgery (and it only cost $10 total...I got it done at school). I'm so happy that I (hopefully) won't have to worry about this annoying adventure I've been going through for about a year any more!!!! YAY...that's my adventure of the day!

~Manda